


Crafter High

by Fintastica



Series: Fin's Hermitcraft Oneshots [4]
Category: Dream SMP - Fandom, Hermitcraft RPF, mcyt
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - High School, Chaos, Gen, requests open
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-10
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-15 23:08:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 2,510
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29322186
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fintastica/pseuds/Fintastica
Summary: A bunch of probably-unrelated plotless school tales
Relationships: None
Series: Fin's Hermitcraft Oneshots [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2124462
Comments: 14
Kudos: 40





	1. Worldbulding stuff

Yep it's a school AU! Students are basically....random folks from the DSMP, Evo, Stampy's Lovely World, or X Life. Or whatever else is out there, I've given up keeping track.

Got a suggesiton? Toss 'em below! Same thing with requests-I love those!

Anyways, roster:

 **Staff**  
Principal - Tinfoil Chef  
Vice-Principal: Hypno Tizd  
History - Wels Knight  
Math - Mumbo Jumbo  
English - Joe Hills  
General Sciences - Cleo Zombie  
Chemistry - Impulse Esvee  
Physics -Kris Zedaph  
Music - Ren Dog  
PE - Tango Tek  
-Soccer coach: False Symmetry  
-Football coach: Tango Tek  
-Basketball: Dr. M. Seventyseven  
-Swim team coach: X. B. Crafted  
-Track team: Impulse Esvee  
Stats and Economics - Dr. M. Seventyseven  
Art - Bdouble Ohundred (though Scar Goodtimes sometimes helps around)  
Computer Science - Xisuma Void (occasional help from Tango Tek and usually randomly invaded by a wandering Etho or Grian)  
Geography: Cub Fan  
Cafeteria - Etho Slab (though it isn't uncommon for him to get kicked out of the kitchen by someone), replaced by Vintage Beef  
Nurse - Stress Monster  
Janitor - Grian Xelqua...or rather, his bots are.  
Groundskeeper - Scar Goodtimes

Librarian: Keralis One

 **School Clubs and Groups**  
Student Council  
Advisors: Grian Xelqua, Scar Goodtimes Joe Hills, False Symmetry (Depending on who's available, though it's usually Grian and Scar)  
President: Scott Smajor  
Vice-president: Tommy Innit  
Other students: Philza Miencraft, Badboy Halo, Stampy Longnose, Tubbo Smith, Dream Wastaken  
About the group: Welcome to Techno's worst nightmare.

School Paper/Yearbook Team  
Advisors: Cub Fan, Cleo Zombie  
Students: Wilbur Soot, Stampy Longnose, ,Sqaishey Quack, Wilbur Soot, Ramboo Ender  
About the group: Totally not biased, ever.

The Evolutionists:  
Advisor: Grian Xelqua  
Students: Pearlescent Moon, System Zee, Mini Muka, Netty Plays, Salem Lady, Big Bst, Tom Mohawk, Solidarity Gaming, Martyn Littlewood  
About the group: A sort of adventure club. Kind of. It's complicated. Totally not a cult.

 **The DreamTeam** :  
Coaches: Iskall Eightyfive, False Symmetry, Ren Dog  
Students: Dream Wastaken, Techno Blade, Philza Minecraft, Tommy Innit, Wilbur Soot, George Notfound, Sap Nap, Badboy Halo, Ant Frost  
About the group: Literally just a sports group. A sports group that realy, really, really likes Grian. The SBI started it and only the logic that his name can't be on their logo keeps them from putting it there.


	2. Hidden Noises

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ding dong merrily on high..in the chem class bells are ringing!

"Mr. Esvee, is this safe? It doesn't look safe."

Impulse Esvee's 10am chemistry class was gathered around a table in the middle of the room, their teacher standing on one ened grinning as usual. On the table were a large assortment of chemicals in various bottles and containers.

"Don't worry, I had Mr. Zedaph and Mr. Tek test everything in every way possible and there's nothing life-threatening here." the chemistry teacher assured the nervous George Notfound. 

"That's not reassuring whatsoever." Techno Blade muttered to Philza Minecraft, who nodded. It was a valid fear- the physics teacher and the PE coach weren't exactly traditional in their methods and more then once they'd come to school with a little less hair then usual.

The class watched as Mr. Esvee walked them through the lab, before attempting it themselves. Luckily for them, nothing blew up, caught fire, or emmitted noxious gases and the only major incident was when Dream and Georges' mixture started turning a strange color after they put a bit too much chlorine in.

Of course they also had to spend half their discussion time hunting down a chiming noise coming from somewhere in the classroom, curtousy of the janitor's current mini fued with Impulse. Apparantly he'd found the bells Impulse had hid in the vents near the supply closet and was not amused. 

Although maybe sending Tommy Innit up into the empty space above the classroom to see if that was where hte noise was wasn't a good idea, seeing as the moment Tommy went up he came right back down cussing a mile a mintue.

"Language!" Badboy yelled from the back of the gorup.

"Oh goodness..." Impulse sighed, climbing up to take a look for himself and grabbing something to cover his ears at the same time. 

In the end, Grian (wearing earmuffs and blasting music from his phone through earbuds) was booted unceremoniously from the classroom and the 10am chemistry class just barely managed to finish their discussion on the day's lab.


	3. Sneak-E-E's

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ghaniya1908's request of Etho + student shenenigans is fufilled

Etho had, for the second time in a week, been chased out of the kitchen after Iskall had come in and taken a whiff of Etho's onion special. That left the cafeteria manager time to do what he did best.

Which in Etho's case, menat walking into everyone else's classrooms and revolutionarizing things.

He hadn't been here the year before but he still knew his way around well enough, so it didn't take him long to reach his first destination: Xisuma Void's Computer Science classroom.

Etho smirked to himself. He could hear the sounds of Xisuma giving out directions, with Tango's voice occassionally chiming in with an additional remark.

Oh, this was going to be fun. But it was too early. Much too early to invade X's personal space. Etho kept moving.

Next up was Impulse's chemistry classroom but Etho din't stop there-he could still hear Grian's little prank from earlier in the day going again and judging by the chaos inside the classroom, the pesky bird might still be up there in that space above the classroom where the ventilation was. Or Grian had put a fake of himself there. It wouldn't be the first time and as much as Etho wanted to see that, he didn't want to grow suspision on himself seeing as he was already doing shenigans with some of the others in Keralis' library. So he kept moving.

Doc's Statistics class was in full session and that one...Well, Doc was a good guy. Etho didn't really want to disturb the Goatfather with some messing around but he did poke his head in and wave. And drop off a container of Halloween candy that Doc needed to finish up their bet. That got a good laugh out of the class and an eyeroll from Doc but Etho didn't mind the latter.

Ren's music class was just a door or two down and this class Etho stopped in for a decent period of time. 

Ok, fine, he mostly just slipped in the back door and hid behind a curtain to play the xylophone at what he considered the appropriate times just to mess with Ren, who was almost positive he hadn't assigned anyone in the percussion section to play a xylophone. 

Etho snickered to himself as Ren shook his head and went back to instructing. The Kakashi lookalike cheerfully plalyed along to the familier tune, only stopping to flash a thumbsup at Grian (who was definitely not in Impulse's classroom's crawl space), who picked up the nearest triangle since his prefered instrument, the gong, was much too obvious.

It was a good 5 more minutes before halfway through a passage of music, the curtain was yanked back by one Mr. Ren Diggity Dog, who looked equal parts amused and annoyed by the janitor and the cook joining his 2pm music class.

"Are you guys seirous right now?" Ren sighed as behind him, his students (who had long since stopped playing) failed to keep their laughter in check.

"Hi Ren. Good to see you too." Grian grinned. 

"Shouldn't you two be working?"

"Huh? Oh yeah, I need to check on RoboG's fuel tanks, gotta fly! Bye!" Grian ditched Etho and hightailed it out of there.

"Hey-" Etho sputtered. Ren was chuckling. "Ok, fine, I'll leave. Oh, by the way, you need to get some new wheels on that xylophone or something, it's hard to move." 

"Cool, thanks for the headsup dude." Ren lightly shoved Etho out and went back to teaching.

After that fun, Etho decided it was time to go mess with X and Tango. And he came in right as Tango found the fake bug Etho had left in an unfinished computer being used for demonstration puposes.

"Oh c'mon, not this again...A bug in the computer...." Tango groaned.

"Better then a real bug." Xisuma pointed out. 

While the students nearest the front of the class and the two teachers were busy with that distraction of a pest, the students nearer to the back noticed Etho in the doorway. A wink and the universal signal to be quiet got him plenty of thumb-ups and quiet snickers, which Etho very much appreciated. Quietly, he crept around the back and moved some pencils from one side of hte desk to the ther before going back and hiding himself to watch. He grinned under his mask as another student who had seen him move the pencils from their usual location on Xisuma Void's desk got up and moved a flask as well.

They were catching on fast.

Every time for the next half hour or so that Xisuma and Tango had their backs turnedd, Xisuma's flask of tea would move, curtousy of Etho who, while moving the flask, would additionally pop a tip quietly to some student or other. After all, it was still school.

Etho was pretty convinced Tango and Xisuma didn't even realize it was him by the time he left to go get ready for the after-school clubs. And he was also pretty certain Tubbo would pass his coding test the next day.


	4. Flamingos and Bad Robots

"Hey, guys, you won't believe what I saw." Sap said as he joined his frineds at their lunch table.

"What? The room with all the parrots inside dancing actually not blasting music for once?" Dream asked.

"Mr. Scar's cat venting?" Phil guessed.

"No wait, I know what it is! It's Mr. Jevin coming back from his trip and fistfighting Mr. Fan for his old post as Geography teacher!" Tommy grinned.

Sap shook his head. "Nope, even better. Mr. Grian and Ms. Cleo trying to get the pose right for a model for the Biology class."

"How is that exciting?" Tommy complained.

"Tommy, has you seen what happens when Mr. Grian and Ms. Cleo are workingon a project together?" Badboy asked. Tommy shook his head. "Oh, then you've got to see this. C'mon, muffinhead!" THe older boy jumped up and dragged the freshman down the hall, a number of the others at their table following.

~~~

Grian and Cleo were busy in the biology classroom staring at the slightly mishapen flamingo.

"It still looks wrong." Grian groaned.

"I'ts a flamingo. How hard is a flamingo of all things supposed to be?" Cleo threw up her hands. "Why is this one so hard then? It's just a oversized pink ostrich!"

"That's the problem. It's an oversized pink ostrich." Grian flopped into the nearest chair. 

"This is such a bad time for your friend to be out of town."

"One hundred perecent the worst time, agreed."

"...What's the chances we can get away with shoving it against the wall and just not showing the left wing?"

"They can still see the leg with the busted kneecap. But maybe if we add this to it..."

Grian tried attaching a small bit of clay to the misshapen leg. And he almost had it, when one of his bots sped into the room, knocked over a chair, and ran into Grian, who lost his balance and cfrashed onto the floor with the giant flamingo on top of him.

Whle Grian attempted to get the very heavy bird off, Cleo chased the little bot around the room, a few of the students watching from the doorway running into help. Not that it did much, the bot was just as elusive as its owner when he wanted to be.

Needless to say, when TFC walked in to see how the flamingo was coming, he made the wise choice to quickly leave before the little rustic house on wheels could wrap the string it had gotton ahold of around his legs.


	5. Great Influences

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> yay more random one/two shots

"That's a fucking horrible idea!"

"Tommy, language!" Bad reprimanded.

"Well, do you have a better one?" Stampy shot back. 

"Yeah, we get Techno to do the announcements. Everyone will listen and we won't have to deal with anyone not knowing."

"Sorry to burst your bubble Tommy, but I get the feeling the student body will listen to you more." Philza pointed out.

Tommy pouted. "No thanks. I don't wanna do a speech."

"Well we gotta do something. Someone has to announce the Fall Festival and I've got a dental appointement tomorow." Scott told him.

"Fu-"

"LANGUAGE!"

"Ok, ok! Geez."

"Well, you guys need to decide who's speaking or if no one's going to do it, find a way to get the word out fast." Scar told the council members. "There's not much time left to procrastinate on this."

Silence fell over the group. Then..

"We could.....just have Dream jump on a table during lunch and announce it. Tubbo sugested.

Dream shrugged. "Sure. I guess...?"

"Well that's setted." Scott girnned. "Guess we can move on to who's going to ask Doc M to help the social committee with decor."

"NOT IT!" several voices chorused.

~~~

False sighed as she settled on the bench. Normally she wasn't in charge of making sure no one died during after-school hours but Grian and Cleo were still working on their flamingo sculpture so as the one teacher not doing anything, she ended up joining Wels on teen-watching duty. Which was determined to be a necessity in a school like Crafter High since Stress was not keen on fixing up kids with sprains, broken bones, and everything else possible. 

Luckily, most of the students were at clubs or extra classes and the majority of students still hanging around were either waiting for rides, waiting for friends, or had decided to just do their stuff in the nicely shaded schoolyard. 

And the internet was great. False, after quickly glancing around to make sure no one was doing anything suspicious, opened up her laptop to do some work while she supervised. Wels soon joined her in grading papers after telling Tommy to stop bouncing his new yo-yo in random direction while right next to Xisuma's car.

For the most part, it was pretty relaxed. But then she heard soemthing that made her pause in her typing.

"Ohhhhh Dreammmm......" George's voice floated through the air, a giddy laugh following.

"This isn't fair!!!! Ms. Symmetry, Mr. Knight, George, Sap, and Badboy won't stop chasing me with sticks!"

False calmly looked up from her laptop, plastering on a neutral expression. "Go arm yourself with that pocketknife in your locker-"

"Falae!" Wels elbowed her

"Fine. No stabbing allowed on campus." False huffed. 

"Oh my goodness....George, Bad, Sap, if you're going to chase Dream with sticks at least get ones that aren't rotting and don't do it in the middle of the parking lot."

"Yes Mr. Knight." The tri oin quesiton chorused, Dream looking a bit disgruntled but following with a nod.

"Good." Wels smirked, then went back to grading.

"What was that about not encouraging violence?" False quietly nudged him.

Wels just rolled his eyes at her. "You're talking to the person who rap battles with his brother for fun on the weekends to procrastinate."

"Okay, fair enough."

**Author's Note:**

> Join the discord for more!
> 
> https://discord.gg/bNsFUZX9Mv


End file.
